Bucket List

I have had a few near death experiences in my life. Some because of diabetes (pre-diagnosis), others because of reasons I would rather not go into. The point is, I have had more than one opportunity to think about my life, and the things I would like to do with it. In fact, I have thought about it so much that I have made myself scared senseless of death and what may or may not come after it. I have grown to the point to where I would rather not think about it at all because the moment I do, I lose all control over my mind and I start an endless argument with myself about whether or not an afterlife really exists. Anyway, the point is; I hate thinking about this, I like to think that I am going to live forever, but now that I must think about things I would want to do before this life ends, there are somethings I would like to do.

• For some reason I have always wanted to go to Tokyo, Japan. I don’t know why, it could be because it is the technological capital of the world, or there could be other reasons that are in my subconscious, but ever since I was a kid I have had a fascination with the country/city. I feel as if they are the perfect society. They don’t have the crazy political masterminds that spend their entire lives trying to manipulate everyone, or the crazy religious zealots that try to force their beliefs down your throat. Everyone lives the way they want to and they are very open with things over there that we would deem inappropriate here (yet their kids still turn out ok, GASP!). Overall it just seems to be the place for me.
• I would love to live to see a cure for diabetes. As much hate and disgust I poured into this diseased condition, I would love to see it wither and die. It has held me back and shortened my life so much that just being able to destroy it would give me such joy you cannot possibly understand. I don’t care if I’m 80 years old when it happens, just as long as I get to see and receive it.
• I want to go to E3. I posted a blog about E3 earlier in the semester, if you are interested you should read it. It is every gamers dream to go to E3. I’m hoping that if I am able to work for a major publisher (such as EA or BioWare) I will be able to go and help build a floor show. I know it is lame, but it’s a dream, and it’s mine.

Essentially, I just want to live to be happy. That’s it. If none of these things happen, I’m ok as long as I am happy.

As for what I want to be remembered by…I have no idea. I help others and do what I can for people less fortunate than I, however, that does not mean that is how I want to be remembered.
I mentioned earlier that I do not like thinking about my death, so thinking about how I want to be remembered is not a thought that frequently crosses my mind.